Emotional hygiene - Guy Winch

https://www.ted.com/talks/guy_winch_the_case_for_emotional_hygiene?referrer=playlist-10_days_of_positive_thinking&language=en

4 aspects to take into consideration: 

• loneliness

 But loneliness is defined purely subjectively. It depends solely on whether you feel emotionally or socially disconnected from those around you.

• failure : protecting self-esteem 

Because if your mind tries to convince you you're incapable of something, and you believe it, then like those two toddlers, you'll begin to feel helpless and you'll stop trying too soon, or you won't even try at all. And then you'll be even more convinced you can't succeed. You see, that's why so many people function below their actual potential. Because somewhere along the way, sometimes a single failure convinced them that they couldn't succeed, and they believed it. Once we become convinced of something, it's very difficult to change our mind. 

• rejection : stop emotional bleeding 

when your self-esteem is lower, you are more vulnerable to stress and to anxiety; that failures and rejections hurt more, and it takes longer to recover from them. So when you get rejected, the first thing you should be doing is to revive your self-esteem, not join Fight Club and beat it into a pulp. When you're in emotional pain, treat yourself with the same compassion you would expect from a truly good friend. 

• rumination : search distraction

 Studies tell us that even a two-minute distraction is sufficient to break the urge to ruminate in that moment. And so each time I had a worrying, upsetting, negative thought, I forced myself to concentrate on something else until the urge passed.

https://ideas.ted.com/7-ways-to-practice-emotional-first-aid/